These Are The Things I Think About -- June18th-24th

Lets start with a cool info nugget I read this week. Looking at how the online world has changed our day to day lives, here's something to consider. Thanks to the Internet, we have gone from 6 degrees of separation to 3.74 degrees. We are now just over people 3 away from anyone on the planet! And just a touch past Pi for all you math lovers.....If, you've got a friend, with a friend, who knows Jenny McCarthy hook me up!

The Octomom's porno video was released this week….Biggest movie opening since The Avengers. --Think about the last line for a moment--…Stole that joke from Conan O’Brien*…send your letters to him.

More with the Octoloser, she is now endorsing a loan company called Octoloan. Their interest rates are as high as 600%. Also 600%, the amount the entire world is confident this lady needs to F.O.A.D….       hint:  final three words are  Off And Die…  figure it out.

Moving on, An Angry Birds theme park is going to open in China. Where, I'm predicting, you will ironically play Angry Birds on your phone while you wait in line for the rides.

Jim Carrey has pulled out of the Dumb and Dumber sequel. Guess he thought the idea was dumb… or dumber-er-er then when he first considered it.

Twitter went down for a while on Thursday. It was chaos as Twitterers couldn’t Tweet that Twittier Twasn’t Tweeting. Or something like that.

This will make you feel old. Cyndi Lauper celebrated her birthday Friday. I woulda never guessed, Cyndi is 59! When asked what girls her age want for their birthday…Cyndi, of course replied, girls just wanna have fun  :-P

From our "terribly bad" joke files: The new Batman movie, Dark Knight Rises opens soon. Tickets are already being scalped for 150 dollars. Wonder if they scalp them for 75 on cheap nights?… Hey, I warned ya it was bad.

And finally a psychologist in the UK crunched some numbers; According to him Wednesday (June 20^th) was to be the ‘Happiest Day Of the Year’. I hope it came true for you. And, back to that first story. You hook me up with Jenny McCarthy, you’ll make it the happiest day of the year for this guy, no matter what the date on the calendar!

-Gilmore

--Oh P.S.  Sad P.S. this time as I need to revisit this photo.

There's me, and 3 brilliant people from work. (Steph, Stefano & Josh) Seriously, I love this photo cause it is proof I knew these 3 before their talents made them huge! The one on the end is Josh Hoffman. (read more about Josh HERE, go to the bottom) Today was his last day at work, and in Timmins, as he’s headed west to B.C. for a new job. Always a fan, he is one of my favourite people to listen to on the air, he’s a hell of a guy too. Best of Luck to Him!

P.S.S--  *-That awesome joke was passed along from non other then Josh Hoffman!

These Are The Things I Think About -- June11th-17th

Well I’m sure you caught it Friday night. Nik Wallenda crossed Niagara Falls on a tightrope. Sure it was a big deal, but the guy is a 7^th generation Carnie, been doing it all his life, of course he thought he could make it. Lets get over it and move on. Tight rope with a 7^th generation Carnie Monkey chasing him, then I’d be interested.

Today is Father’s day. Also known as “please don’t let there be a card in the mail” day for single guys everywhere. But you know it’s good to be a dad, as spending is up for them this year!  last minute gift idea, if money is no object, you really wanna spoil him, I say fill up his car. OK, half a tank, you’re not that rich. Then listen to his story about how gas used to be 20 cents a gallon……I smell father-child bonding experience!

Talking kids. From today’s awesome file, a company in Spain has designed a bed that makes itself.  What kid wouldn’t want that?!….Go make your bed. Done mom, bring on the Cheerios!

In music, this one ain’t right. Rihanna, she has now sold more singles in the UK than The Rolling Stones. Notable yes, but come back when you’ve done more drugs then Keith Richards, then I’ll be impressed.

Just as wrong….No wait, wronger. Naked photos of Jersey Shore’s Snookie have surfaced online. Her publicist has confirmed it. Anyone else feel like canceling their internet service today?

In fashion, Australian scientists have taken edible undies to the next level. They’ve created a new line of underwear made from red wine. They put a bacteria in the wine which turns it into a cotton-like substance. My question, Why? I like my wine in a glass, not covering my…. Zing.... yeah, bad zing :-P

And finally, next time you are buying steaks or hamburgers for barbecuing stock up! Number Crunchers are predicting the price of beef is set to jump big time… Yeah heard it here first kids!

-Gilmore

--Oh P.S. Certainly couldn’t mention this week without including the fact the L.A. Kings won the Stanley Cup! They become the first 8^th seed* to win the Stanley Cup. It's the Kings' first Championship in franchise history. I’ll let Jonathan Quick explain how great this team really is:

* yeah, remember when everyone was saying 1^st seed Vancouver was going to destroy them in the first round?!… I didn’t… Suck it ‘Nucks fans… hahaha!

P.S.S.--   And one for the Goodfellas fans. Henry Hill, the man Ray Liotta played and whose life story inspired the movie, has passed away. He was 69. Ray Liotta paid tribute to Henry this week saying quote ''I only met him a few short times so I can't say I knew him but, I do know he lived a complicated life. 'My heart goes out to his family and may he finally rest in peace.'' And I’ll pay a little tribute to Ray Liotta’s awesome performance in his role as Henry here:

These Are The Things I Think About -- June4th-10th

Well it’s interesting times for comic book fans. DC Comics confirms, after 72 years, The Green Lantern is being revamped & he is turning gay. As per usual people with nothing better to do have already started writing letters to DC Comics in protest… it’s a comic folks, get over yourselves… 

Now to something that might actually turn me gay. Confirmed, the Octomom will perform topless at a bar in Florida next month……Actually this needs a correction; Turn me gay & make me wanna scoop my eyes out with a rusty spoon. 

Moving on, troubles continue for Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg. Investors are now suing him claiming he purposely mislead them regarding the company’s stock. Billions of dollars have been lost the past month. I’m copywriting it now “Fail-Book”. You heard it hear first kids! 

Survey time, what is the worst for these 2 ideas: 

A: Jerry O'Connell playing Herman Munster in a remake of the 'Munsters’      or 

B: Ashton Kutcher starring in a remake of Smokey and the Bandit. 

Both terrible, I gotta go with “B”. Cold day in hell before I’ll call Ashton Kutcher Bandit.

More from entertainment, the music world said its final goodbyes to Bee Gee Robin Gibb this week. A private family funeral was held. I hear they played some of his favourite Bee Gee hits during the service. Certainly hope Stayin’ Alive wasn’t among them…. Awkward. 

And finally. Anyone who had “under 2 weeks” in the how long until eating a face becomes a tourist spectacle, you win! Miami's "Mystery & Mayhem" bus tour has just added the city’s MacArthur Causeway off-ramp to its stops. It’s the location where police discovered & shot the guy eating the other guys face. Other tour stops include Al Capone’s old house. Book your tickets now!! 

-Gilmore

These Are The Things I Think About -- May28th-June3rd

Here we go again! It’s a big weekend in the UK as the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee is underway. 60 years on the throne. Insert classy toilet joke here…  

It could be a wild days ahead as well in the US, Hurricane Season officially began Friday. How exciting. Forecasters are predicting a “near-normal” season. Wait, near-normal…. That doesn’t sound promising to me when talking Hurricanes. I’m just saying.  

Hope you didn’t invest in Facebook. Shares in the company dipped below 29 dollars this past week. Meaning, so far the company has lost 25 billion dollars since May 18th! I’m no economist, I’m really bad with “the math”,  but negative 25 Billion, oh, that ain’t good.  

Moving on, you probably heard about the guy in Florida who police shot because he was eating another guys face! If you hadn’t, guess what?!…A guy in Florida was shot by police because they found him Eating Another Guys Face!  :-0 ..Turns out he may have been hallucinating on Bath Salts. Yeah, apparently Bath Salts when misused are powerful hallucinogens. So you better be super nice to grampa after he goes for a soak in the tub!  

In music, Bob Dylan was honoured by US President Obama with the Presidential Medal of Freedom this week. The highest civilian honour in the US, Bob was super excited & thankful to receive the the award… Well, we think that’s what he said.

 

Finally something to raise your spirits, and hopefully that’s all. The International Pole Sport Federation has made it clear. They want the Olympic Committee to make pole dancing an Olympic sport. Here here!  Think about it, who wouldn’t want to meet a gold medal winner in pole dancing?…Am I wrong?!  

-Gilmore

 

--Oh P.S. NHL Stanley Cup Finals started this week. (LA's up 2-0 in the series!)...One of my favourite parts of the HNIC* broadcast, which is always fantastic by the way, is/are --brain farting, which is right?-- the Intro Montages they do. This one was great!

 

Game One 2012 Stanley Cup Finals on CBC:

P.S.S-- *HNIC is also a random reference to a Morgan Freeman movie. I'll let you do the digging to find out. And, it's also a classy segue, I bring it up since Morgan Freeman's birthday was Thursday, he's 75....Oh classy segue indeed!